2003, Movies

Julie and Jack (2003, James Nguyen)

The lighting, the sound…I would expect nothing less from James Nguyen.

I had certain expectations about this movie given that Nguyen made Birdemic, a strong candidate for the worst movie of all time. My expectations were so low that this film actually didn’t rise to Worst of All Time. Most boring Film of All Time, though, is in contention.

Stray thoughts:

  • Imagine talking to someone on a chat app for the first time and just telling them your friends’ last names.
  • If you ever want a tour of San Francisco without spending any money – and with terrible lighting – you can watch the beginning of Julie and Jack’s courtship. I feel like the music during the San Francisco courtship montage is echoing the melody of “Forever Young,” probably without permission. Then Julie says “forever young” and it no longer feels like it’s just me.
  • I must say, the virtual reality thing caught me off guard. I don’t think it was artfully done in any particular way, especially because we the audience were not given the opportunity to figure it out.
  • He put himself in his movie!
  • Does he just call somebody at his company without identifying himself and they just give him the information about JB?
  • I love how, in the one flashback, he leaves in the stutter. I get that it’s natural but you know with Nguyen that it was the best take.
  • in one of the many flashbacks, the man flashing back says “Do you like to…uh, dance?” and there’s no music!
  • And then Jack just goes to a church where he is the whitest person in there and they just sing for a while. He claps like my stepdad.
  • The stakes in this movie. Employee of the quarter! There has never been a movie with stakes like this.
  • Dig that final song.

The sound and lighting put this movie among the worst ever made. But I actually think the plot elevates it out of that level to a slightly less terrible level of among the worst movies ever made. It’s certainly less fun than so many bad movies, because of how fucking serious it is at all times.

If I could give it a 1.5/10 I would. Because it’s terrible but it’s not Birdemic.

PS Poor Tippi Hedren. I hope she never watched it.

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